It’s amazing how quickly your mood can change, how deep your heart can sink and how much one person can affect you..

I remember when we’ve talk about our future like we had a clue.. I never planned that one day, I’d be losing you..

in another life I would be your girl, we’d keep all our promises be us against the world.. in another life I would make you stay, so I don’t have to say you were the one that got away..

Never one without the other we made a pact.. Sometimes when I miss you, I put those records on.. It’s time to face the music, I’m no longer your Shayne ward..

All this money can’t buy me a time machine.. It can’t replace you with a million rings.. I should I told you what you meant to me, I really need you..

ya Allah,

Jika saya bukan pemilik tulang rusuknya,

janganlah biarkan saya merindukan kehadirannya lagi..

Janganlah biarkan saya melabuhkan hati ini di hatinya..

Jangan sebarkan lagi rasa yang putih bersseutaskan makna ini..

Kikislah pesona nya dari pelupuk mata saya..

Serta usirlah dia dari relung hati saya..

Gantilah damba kerinduan dan cinta yang bersemayam di dada ini dengan kasih dari dan pada-Mu yang tulus dan murni..

yeah, I’m scared..

yes I’m jealous..

I’m scared that you think she’s pretty..

I’m scared that you will find her more interesting..

I’m scared that you will think she’s so much better than me..

I’m scared that you might leave me soon..

And yes I’m jealous that she gets to see you.,

I’m jealous that you talked to her..

I’m jealous that you had fun with her..

I’m scared.

I’m jealous.

But that’s only because you mean a lot of me..

:’)

I miss how we used to talk everyday, how we text each other good morning and call each other just to say goodnight, I miss that :(

I miss when you held my hand all the time when we‘re sitting together in the car and you were singing the song “Shayne Ward - Breathless” :(

I miss when every day before I was ready to go to college that you’ve been waiting in the living room of my house to take me to the campus. and you’re always faithful waiting for me to go home until 6 pm to wait in the parking lot behind Poltek :(

I miss that every night you must have fallen asleep waiting for me out of the shower and have a mask for our schedule on the night phone :(

I miss when we walk in the mall, if I don’t hold your hand you’d be mad because you think that I’m ashamed of the way with you. I really really miss that time :(

I miss when you’re always giving me gifts to make me happy :(

I miss when every drive me home, you must give a kind word to me a password, which makes me believe that you really love me :(

I miss when you check my phone every day for fear that if I call another guys :(

I miss when I was angry, you’d always be scared and apologized to me, then  you are afraid to lose me until you cry and makes us re-tender :(

I miss when you hugged me very tightly as if you’re afraid to reveal that lose me  and you made me feel like I’m the last woman who you love :(

I miss all your promises, and you asked me to get engaged with you and establish a relationship that is more serious for our future :(

I miss when it was time for evening prayer, you also become my priest and I’m really proud to have a boyfriend like you :(

I miss when we didn’t meet one day, you’re make me feel that you cant live without me as well as like me :(

I miss when you’re stroking my hair, I miss when you look at me with love, I miss when you’re trying to make me laugh when I’m sad :(

Essentially, I miss all of your treatment of me .. I miss being with you .. I miss when you were always there beside me under any circumstances .. I miss the days of 8 months we were together .. I miss all the memories of albiy .. I missed you the first .. I miss you .. really :(